Sunday, June 5, 2011

Lie to me...or don't...I won't know....


While driving with Chan to his movie date:

Me: Chan- who are you meeting at the movies?

Chan: Tersely- "Someone."

Me: "A girl?"

Chan: "Yes mom, a girl."

Me: "Do I know her?"

Chan: Irritated- "No Mom- you don't"
Me: "Aha...I can tell by the way were lips are pursed that I know her....hmmmm. Is she from ROTC? Does she attend [your highs school]?"

Chan: "No Mom, she is not in ROTC...and yes, I go to school with her."

Me: "LIAR- SHE is in ROTC...I can tell ...by the way you exhibited a vocal tremor!

Chan: Quietly shaking his head...well, sort of disgustedly shaking his head....

Me: "Are you dating a guy?"
Chan: Exasperated- "What the hell is wrong with you?!"

Me: "Nothing- I just got your truth baseline."


Wednesday, June 1, 2011

No- YES!!!

My bestest and I had the honor of providing therapy for one of the most lively, fun, beautiful spirits ever. Therapy sessions with this elderly woman often went like this. (Obviously, names are changed).

Bestest and/or Me: "Samantha let's have some ice cream."

Samantha: Emphatically- "NO- THAT is a HORRIBLE IDEA. YOU HAVE HORRIBLE IDEAS. LEAVE ME ALONE!"

Bestest and/or Me: "You are RIGHT. Horrible idea- Let's not do it."

Samantha calms. We wait 30 seconds.

Bestest and/or me: "Samantha!"

Samantha: "What?"

Bestest and/or me: "We are hungry, let's eat ice cream!"

Samantha: Excitedly- "OKAY! Let's! Oh this is delicious! Thank you!"

And so our sessions went. Samantha was initially disgusted with anything we suggested or requested- Then, she would quickly change her mind and express deep gratitude.

As Samantha tip toed to meet her maker-I imagine that the conversation went like this:

"Samantha! Let's go to heaven!"

Samantha: "No! I don't want to go right now!

30 seconds lapse

"Samantha!"
Samantha: "What?"

"Let's see what is going on in heaven"

Samantha " Okay, Let's!...Oooohhh this is so lovely. Thank you!!"

God bless you Samantha- we loved knowing you!