In A Day's Work

Generally speaking teenagers that are taking regular education or honors courses do not enjoy coming to "speech." Anything that separates you from the herd is embarrassing.

I understand this- So I bribe my highs schoolers. Candy if you come independently. Good candy-NOT the dollar store kind. & I try my best to find out what the student enjoys and we focus on that in therapy. You want to get your driver's license. GREAT!!! I'll gladly spend the next 12 sessions going over Driver's Ed vocabulary, reading comprehension, and auditory comprehension. All while were correctly articulating the "s" and "r" words. AND because the student wants his/her permit, they will not only attend speech, but will look forward to attending. Win/Win.

This works for about half of the students. For the others, I have to figure out what class they are currently attending, who is the teacher, and the phone number for the room. Then, I have to call the room and ask the teacher to send the student to my room. Then I wait.

When you call for a student- Chances are very good that they will never show. They use this opportunity to roam. If they do show, they will be delayed in arriving. This is because they:

"Had to stop at the restroom"

"Had to go to clinic"

"Had to talk to my boyfriend/girlfriend"

"Had to go the office"

"Had to talk to my __________ teacher."

" Had to try to save the kitten that is under the portable."

"Got into a fight with Brittany...her nose is bleeding....she is in the restroom."

"Had to text my dad about picking me up early, because I don't feel well...can you write me a pass for the clinic...WHY NOT?"

One of my students hadn't shown up & I didn't have a current schedule for her. So, I called the front office-the names of students and schools have been changed:

Me: "Can you tell me what class Sarah Lee is in?"

Office: "She is in Marine Science with Mr. Lamb"

Me: "Thanks"

I go through the files and locate and dial the number for Mr. Lamb.

Mr. Lamb: "Hello?"

Me: "Hi, do you have a Sarah Lee in class?"

Mr. Lamb: "Uh...No" Slightly panicked ..."Should I?!!!"

Me: Not understanding the panic..."Well, according the front office you do have her. When she does show up, will please send her to P26?"

Mr. Lamb: "uh....okay, with a buddy?"

Me: "A buddy, (not sure if he is joking) ha ha...no, all by herself." (what is wrong with this guy?!)

Mr. Lamb: Now frantic... "What does she look like?"

Me: "I have only met her once- I don't remember." I can hear him asking other teachers asking about Sarah.

Mr. Lamb: After a loooong pause. "Where are you calling from?"

Me: "My portable....why?"

Mr. Lamb: "You have called Elderberry Elementary, I am in a 1st grade classroom...What school are you calling from?"

And this is how Sarah got away with skipping speech this week...